Should collaring be significant?
Collaring is something that many submissives strive for in BDSM relationships or dynamics, collars many different things to different people in the kink world. We all have different needs and preferences, and as with all things BDSM, there is no rule book.
There are common protocols around collars in the BDSM community, and that is that a submissive needs to earn a collar, and only their Dom/me can give them a collar. A collar is a significant step in a BDSM dynamic and is not taken lightly by many kinky people. So you may be wondering what a collar signifies in a BDSM dynamic? Below are a few examples:
- It confirms your commitment to each other in your dynamic as a Dom/me and submissive.
- It shows ownership out in public and at events or kinky parties.
- Collars can be used in a scene or at a dungeon to indicate your role.
- Collars form part of kinky play, so it might just be an accessory.
Promising a submissive a collar should not be done lightly as it is a promise in the sense of a future together. The same goes for threatening to take a collar away from a submissive, which signifies an end to the dynamic. Depending on the person and your dynamic, a collar could hold a lot of meaning to someone or just be an accessory.
Day collars are jewelry and often look like jewelry; most kinky people will see it and know what it is, where vanilla people will just see jewelry. These collars often come with a locking mechanism that only your Dom/me has a key for, so only they can remove it, thereby claiming ownership over you.
Many submissives want to have a collaring ceremony when their Dom/me has purchased their collar. It can at times be a big thing similar to a wedding ceremony, or it could just be you and your partner on vacation or in a unique location that bears a connection for both of you.
It’s a great source of pride to be officially collared by their Dom/me for submissives and is considered an honor. While a Dominant must continuously earn the consent and trust of their submissive. A submissive who understands the importance of being collared will always earn the right to keep their collar. When a Dominant removes a collar, it signals the end of the relationship.